Emily, I read this whole newsletter and then towards the end I read my name!!! What a beautiful surprise 🥹. Thank you so much for including me and I am happy it resonated with you.
I was nodding my head reading through all of this. I grew up in a household where speaking up, particularly as a woman, wasn’t a great quality. I am slowly learning that confrontation it’s not bad thing and its needed sometimes. Thanks from always writing from the heart! Can’t wait to listen to your podcast, have added it to my Spotify playlist 🙂↔️
Gracias por mencionar mi substack <3<3 !!! Me ha hecho mucha ilusión verme aquí!
Con respecto a lo que cuentas en esta newsletter, me alegra que dijeras "no" y que rompieras esa barrera, así ya tienes la certificación oficial de que la gente que te aprecia nunca te juzgará por bajarte de algo que no te hace bien <3
A mi me hace mil ilusión leerte así que es mutuo!!!!!
Esa última frase “la gente que te aprecia nunca te juzgará por bajarte de algo que no te hace bien” acaba de golpearme fuerte, qué forma tan sencilla de verlo y cuánta verdad!!! <3
I loved this post because I thought for a moment it was written by yours truly ♡
I already talked about that in a post, but something that was really really helpful to get rid of my most horrific patterns was the Hoffman Process; if you want to look it up 👀
I did it my self. Is a week-long residential retreat, so you go there for a week (without phone, computer, etc) and spend the week doing the process (with some pre and post homework of course)
I honestly loved it and one the best thing I have ever done in my life! ◡̈
I relate to you so much. The idea of someone being mad at me when I say “no” to them while looking out for my own needs gives me anxiety. So far that I talk myself into saying “yes” thinking that the consequences of that will be so much more bearable then them being mad at me. Which is so unhealthy. Feels good to know I’m not alone in this journey!
You’re definitely not alone! And you’re not alone on the road to changing that pattern either. Some times it’s easier than others, but most of the times (always?) it’s our own mind fabricating everything trying to protect us. But we’re safe now, that’s what I always try to remember nowadays. No matter what, I’m safe with myself ❤️🩹
Thank you so much for mentioning my article! The beautiful thing about substack for me is that I am able to share these really vulnerable parts of myself with others who feel the same way <3
And speaking of sharing, I really relate to everything you are talking about. I have such a problem with voicing my needs, and it is comforting to know that I am not the only one. As you said, I think it is a process and it probably will feel very hard to speak up for ourselves for a while now, and that is okay! I see my friends setting boundaries with such ease, I'm a little bit jealous of them to be honest :,) But I feel like it is really helpful to surround yourself with others that are good communicators and vocal about their needs. My friends are probably the people who inspire me the most, so I'm hoping they will inspire me in that aspect, too!
That really is the great side of substack, when we share our journey and the things we're dealing with we realise that we're not alone and it feels like a hug from a friend <3 I've found that saying the word "no" more and seeing that nothing bad comes from it has helped me to re-train my brain and feel safe around it. Then I've tried taking bigger steps by putting bigger limits and boundaries and I'm actually starting to love the feeling! We'll get there in the end :') I agree with what you say, having friends and people around you that set their own boundaries is inspiring and can help us to do the same thing :)
Emily, I read this whole newsletter and then towards the end I read my name!!! What a beautiful surprise 🥹. Thank you so much for including me and I am happy it resonated with you.
I was nodding my head reading through all of this. I grew up in a household where speaking up, particularly as a woman, wasn’t a great quality. I am slowly learning that confrontation it’s not bad thing and its needed sometimes. Thanks from always writing from the heart! Can’t wait to listen to your podcast, have added it to my Spotify playlist 🙂↔️
And what a lovely surprise for me to read your lovely comment! I’m really glad it resonated with you and that I’m not alone on this path 🥹🤝🏼
Ahhhhhh let me know if you enjoy the podcast! Thank you thank you thank you 💝
Gracias por mencionar mi substack <3<3 !!! Me ha hecho mucha ilusión verme aquí!
Con respecto a lo que cuentas en esta newsletter, me alegra que dijeras "no" y que rompieras esa barrera, así ya tienes la certificación oficial de que la gente que te aprecia nunca te juzgará por bajarte de algo que no te hace bien <3
A mi me hace mil ilusión leerte así que es mutuo!!!!!
Esa última frase “la gente que te aprecia nunca te juzgará por bajarte de algo que no te hace bien” acaba de golpearme fuerte, qué forma tan sencilla de verlo y cuánta verdad!!! <3
I loved this post because I thought for a moment it was written by yours truly ♡
I already talked about that in a post, but something that was really really helpful to get rid of my most horrific patterns was the Hoffman Process; if you want to look it up 👀
Thank you!!! I’ve read up on it and it looks interesting, did you do it yourself? On a course? With a therapist…?
I did it my self. Is a week-long residential retreat, so you go there for a week (without phone, computer, etc) and spend the week doing the process (with some pre and post homework of course)
I honestly loved it and one the best thing I have ever done in my life! ◡̈
That's awesome, I'll take a look into it! Thank you for sharing <3
I relate to you so much. The idea of someone being mad at me when I say “no” to them while looking out for my own needs gives me anxiety. So far that I talk myself into saying “yes” thinking that the consequences of that will be so much more bearable then them being mad at me. Which is so unhealthy. Feels good to know I’m not alone in this journey!
You’re definitely not alone! And you’re not alone on the road to changing that pattern either. Some times it’s easier than others, but most of the times (always?) it’s our own mind fabricating everything trying to protect us. But we’re safe now, that’s what I always try to remember nowadays. No matter what, I’m safe with myself ❤️🩹
That’s such a good mantra to remember - I’m safe with myself. Thank you for that💟
I love this one
I love you, thank you 🩷
Thank you so much for mentioning my article! The beautiful thing about substack for me is that I am able to share these really vulnerable parts of myself with others who feel the same way <3
And speaking of sharing, I really relate to everything you are talking about. I have such a problem with voicing my needs, and it is comforting to know that I am not the only one. As you said, I think it is a process and it probably will feel very hard to speak up for ourselves for a while now, and that is okay! I see my friends setting boundaries with such ease, I'm a little bit jealous of them to be honest :,) But I feel like it is really helpful to surround yourself with others that are good communicators and vocal about their needs. My friends are probably the people who inspire me the most, so I'm hoping they will inspire me in that aspect, too!
That really is the great side of substack, when we share our journey and the things we're dealing with we realise that we're not alone and it feels like a hug from a friend <3 I've found that saying the word "no" more and seeing that nothing bad comes from it has helped me to re-train my brain and feel safe around it. Then I've tried taking bigger steps by putting bigger limits and boundaries and I'm actually starting to love the feeling! We'll get there in the end :') I agree with what you say, having friends and people around you that set their own boundaries is inspiring and can help us to do the same thing :)