191. Drawing lines in quick sand to protect myself.
You're probably still talking about yourself, where was our turning point and forgive but don't forget.
What is “Sparks”?
When I read good books and sentences pass through me, leaving me changed, I feel sparks. I feel sparks when I underline passages of a text with my black pen and feel the urge to write about them. I feel sparks when I’m sure the author was actually talking about my life.
“Sparks” is a new section of POMELO where I will recover underlined fragments of books I’ve read to dig deeper, layer after layer.
and I have a podcast called in which we use different fragments of a non-fiction book to build our episode on. This section was inspired by Carlota and our podcast but it’s not the same thing. No two things can ever be the same because they belong to completely different contexts and times. You can listen to FRAGMENTOS podcast here and you can read Carlota’s newsletter here.Now let’s get into the first ever issue of Sparks.
Today’s book I’ve chosen to recover passages from is called El ataque de las cabras by Laura Chivite.
Cuando pasábamos largas temporadas sin hablar, me asaltaba el pensamiento de que tal vez hubiera muerto. Y a veces, una presión me subía del estómago al pecho hasta ahogarme. Pero, rápidamente, entre jadeos, me decía a mí misma que eso era imposible. Que estaba viva y coleando en alguna parte pintándose las uñas mientras hablaba de sí misma. Eso me tranquilizaba. — Página 126-127.
Now, in English:
When we went long stretches without talking, the thought that she might have died would creep in. And sometimes, a pressure would rise from my stomach to my chest until it suffocated me. But quickly, gasping, I would tell myself that that was impossible. That she was alive and kicking somewhere, painting her nails while talking about herself. That thought calmed me. — Page 126-127.
I read this book two months ago and I know why it’s taken me this long to sit and write about these passages I underlined. It’s a difficult topic, that’s why but the time has come to go through it layer after layer.